Melting Ice
by bluesybug
Summary: Work and play aren't meant to be mixed. But what happens when they do? A Sidney Crosby story.
1. Chapter 1

She took a deep breath and entered the room. It was filled with at least 30-40 people, most of them men. All of them had their back to the door, and she was grateful to slip in unnoticed, as another man she vaguely recognized droned on from the front of the room. She quickly scanned the room for a familiar face and saw Grant leaning against the wall on the side of the room. She quietly made her way towards him, flashing him the briefest of smiles before easing herself against the wall next to him.

"What took you so long?" Grant said out of the corner of his mouth, angling his head ever so slightly towards her.

"Couldn't find the reflex hammers." She wanted to elaborate more. About how they were scattered over the place, and she had searched for several minutes for the tiny instruments. But she knew that when it came to Grant and his career, he didn't care about the details, so long as it was taken care of now. Closing and opening her mouth once more, she breathed out a final "but I found them in the end," Before Grant nodded and turned his body away from her and back to the front of the room.

Grant could be anal retentive sometimes, but he was a good doctor. And she looked up to him. He was several years ahead of her in terms of medical training, and was essentially where she wanted to be down the round. He was also completely gorgeous: he had the whole tall, dark, and handsome thing going for him. He was also among one of the smartest and nicest people she knew. And of course, he had a serious girlfriend.

As Grant turned away, the voice from the front of the room began speaking and there was a short burst of applause from the audience before Dr. Green briefly took the stage.

"I'm afraid that I'm not much of a talker," Dr Green chuckled from the front of the room. His green eyes twinkled, and whatever nerves she had were replaced with a sense of warmth and comfort. Dr. Green had a skill to make people feel comfortable. "But I would like to say a few words. I think this a fantastic team of world class players, and I feel privileged to be involved in your care. To be the team physician for the Pittsburgh Penguins is a dream come true for me, and I respect everything that you all do. You leave your heart, soul, and passion on that ice everyday, and I'm here to help you with that. I don't want to you think of me and my team as your trainers, I want you to come to us with health problems and concerns of any nature. We're here for you. And on that note, I want to wish you a very happy and health season and introduce you to my fellow, Grant, and resident, Joanna that will be helping me, and all of you, this season."

Grant stepped forward and raised a hand in acknowledgement before falling back against the wall. Joanna made to do the same motion. She lifted both of her hands in a lame wave, as her eyes scanned the room. All of the team's players had their eyes trained on her and Grant, taking them in. She was about to join Grant against the wall, when her eyes locked on a familiar set of brown eyes.

"Holy shit."

…...

_6 months ago_

Joanna jabbed the button of the lobby elevator up button aggressively. She had been waiting for a solid five minutes to go up to her hotel room, and still no luck. If she wasn't staying on the 14th floor, she would have taken the stairs. And somehow pressing the button extra times made it feel like the elevator would come that much sooner.

Ding. A herd of people slowly exited the elevator, as she made her way on. And just as the doors began to close, a hand suddenly shot out attempting to pause the elevator. The doors spluttered for a second, before slowly cranking open again.

"Sorry! 15 please." Said the man, while stepping onto the elevator. He nodded over to where Joanna stood, indicating that she should press the button for his floor.

Considering they were in Spain, she was surprised he spoke English to her. I must really look like a tourist, Joanna thought to herself. I guess staying in a hotel was the first tip off, that and the classic straw tourist hat she had on over her head.

Joanna snuck a peak at this English-speaking foreigner from the corner of her eye. Broad shouldered, short brown hair, dazzling smile. This guy was hot. Self consciously, she looked down at herself and noticed that she had a fine dusting of sand still stuck to her left arm. Just having returned from the beach, she had taken advantage of the beautiful weather in Madrid that morning. And of course, here she was covered all over in sand, while the hottest guy she had seen in a while was standing just a few feet away. Feeling her cheeks heat, she couldn't help but futilely fume over her poor choice of clothing – a flimsy transparent cover-up over her green bikini. In an effort to hide her nudity, she folded her arms across her chest as she watched the numbers above her head slowly churn upwards to their respective destinations.

Suddenly things began to shake and the entire elevator shaft came to a sickening halt.

Daring to take a deep breath, Joanna looked over at the handsome stranger. He looked just as shell-shocked as she felt, and probably looked too.

"Are you okay?" he asked her, when she nodded, he walked over to where she stood and began to punch at the alarm button. He knelt down at her feet and felt around until he was able to pop open the latch for the emergency phone.

"Hello?" he spoke into the receiver, "Yeah, hi, we're stuck in the elevator before floors… 10 and 11 I think." He paused and Joanna waited inpatiently for the response on the other end. "So you'll send someone to look at it? Great. Okay, well we'll be here." He chuckled and set the receiver done before flashing her a wide grin and straightening up. "Someone from maintenance will be up soon."

"Okay." Joanna breathed out, her initial panic having subsided. "Sounds good. I guess we'll play the waiting game now?" and she took a seat on the floor of the elevator as she said it

"Yeah I guess." Said the stranger, sitting down as well.

Well, no time like the present to introduce yourself she thought to herself. Seeing as they were both going to be trapped here until rescued. "Hi, I'm Joanna." She said, extending her hand.

"Hi. I'm James" and as he said so, his brown eyes twinkled back at her, almost as if he was enjoying his own private joke. "So what brings you to Madrid?" he asked, leaning his head against the elevator wall and stretching out his tanned legs in front of him.

"Vacation. Just graduated from school, so sort of like a present to myself." She lightly giggled, tossing her dark beach tossed locks from her shoulders.

She looked up in time to see James' eyes follow the shift of her hair, and then refocus on her face. "What did you graduate from?"

"Med school."

"Wow. Where from?"

"New York. I'm Canadian, but living in there right now." He winced slightly as she spoke, but recovered quickly with a gorgeous smile, one that lit up his whole face. He had smiled twice since she had met him, and she was beginning to love it. "What about you?"

"I'm Canadian too, from the Maritimes. Here on vacation with some friends." The way he said it with his eyes clouding over, she wondered if he was telling the truth. Or some variation of it. He was probably here with his girlfriend and that's why he was skirting around his words.

"Whereabouts in the Mari-" she was interrupted by the shrill ringing of the emergency phone, and quickly scooted over to the front of the elevator. "Hello?"

"Hi this is the front desk staff at the hotel." Said a voice in heavily accented English, "I Want to inform you that the elevator maintenance repairman has been notified, and he will be on his way shortly. But he likely will not arrive for another our hour. In the meantime, are you and your companion alright?"

Joanna looked over at James with a sad expression, "They said it's going to be at least another hour until the repairman gets here."

James couldn't help but take in Joanna's form as she crouched on the floor cradling the phone to her neck. This girl was beautiful, a doctor, and Canadian to boot. She was all tanned skin, gorgeous curves, dark hair, and a dazzling smile. He wouldn't mind being stuck in an elevator with her all day. He attempted to arrange his features into a neutral expression before looking back at her, "There could be worse things. Tell them we're happy to wait." And as she turned back to speak into the phone, he couldn't help but smile. Things were looking up.


	2. Chapter 2

The emergency phone sounded again, and Joanna crawled her way towards it once more. James had been a playful companion for the last two hours, they chatted and laughed, maybe even flirted a little bit. She had thought to herself afterwards, I'm on vacation… Live a little! He told her about growing up in a small town she had never heard of outside of Halifax, and how he had moved to the city to work as a teacher. She told him about leaving Toronto to move to NYC for school after foolishly following a boy that she was no longer seeing.

What started out as a way to pass the time between two strangers in an elevator, ended with the pair sitting by side. He stayed close to her, and had she angled her thighs only a fraction of an inch towards him, they would have been touching.

"Hello?"

"Hello this is the front desk again. The repair is almost complete and I wanted to let you know that the elevator should begin ascending momentarily."

"That sounds wonderful. Thank you so much." She said, grinning widely into the receiver and back at James as she made her way towards him again.

"We'll be moving soon, he said just a few moments." And just as she finished, the elevator begin moving again. Both her and James watched with bated breath as the elevator ascended a few more feet to the 14th floor and the doors opened with a soft ping.

She looked at James with a disbelieving expression before lithely jumping to her feet and moving towards the exit. James was quick to follow her. "I'm one floor up, but I think I'll take the stairs the rest of the way." He said to her as they walked side-by-side to the hallway.

"I don't blame you." She said, as her shoulder softly nudged his. As they reached the fork in the hallway, the lefthand side leading to her room, and the righthand side to the stairs, James timidly took a step towards her, his dark eyes smoldering in the dim lighting of the hotel hallway.

"Let me take you to dinner tonight."

A bubble of relief formed inside of her, she had been unhappy at the thought of never seeing him again.

Unable to formulate words or a coherent thought, all Joanna could do was look up at him and drink him in. His broad shoulders strained against his tshirt, a promise of what was underneath. His natural male scent mixed with light cologne drifted into her senses, ands she was momentarily paralyzed. She nodded looking up at him.

"You just made my day, you know that?" he said, his eyes suddenly shifting from a lust filled gaze to a light humoured one. "I'll meet you here at seven. That okay?"

Joanna managed to actually formulate the words "yes" this time without appearing like a bumbling idiot. As they parted ways, and she began walking down the hall towards her room, she couldn't help but look back at the spot where he had just asked her out. Expecting an empty hallway, she was surprised when she saw that James was still there. His hands casually placed in the pockets of his shorts, a wide smile on his face. "See you tonight." He called out to her, and opened the doors to the stairway and disappeared. She could his fading footsteps as she opened the door to her own room.

She couldn't help but lean against the closed doorway for a moment as she took in the site of her freshly made bed and clean room, a huge smile breaking out on her face. James had been completely unexpected and delightful. She could barely count down the hours until seven pm.

…..

Dinner had been wonderful. Despite the weather, James dressed in fashionable trousers and a navy button down shirt with sleeves rolled to his elbows and open slightly at the collar. Joanna had worn the only dress she had brought with her, a simple red dress that fell to the mid thigh. The fabric was loose enough that the mid summer rays from the Spanish heat weren't biting into her skin, but with still enough skin showing that it felt like a date dress. James had taken her to a delicious tapas restaurant downtown, and the two had shared their food and a bottle of wine. Conversation flowed effortlessly as did the wine.

After dinner, he had taken her to a fountain water show outside of one of the largest museums in the city. Only steps away from their hotel, the museum stood anchored in the heart of the city, drawing hundreds to its nightly show. As the deep chords of a symphonic display of music bellowed from the depths of the museum, the fountain outside danced merrily to the music, illuminated by shimmering lights. It was magical and breathtaking.

James laced a hand through Joanna's as the two watched the show in comfortable silence.

"James, this is beautiful." Joanna said, turning towards him. The magnificence of the lightshow left all amazed, and as she looked up at his profile, she saw the coloured lights dancing against his dark hair.

"No, you're beautiful." It was a little cheesy that he said that, and it registered in her head for the briefest of seconds while he unlaced his hand from hers and slipped both of his hands firmly behind her back. And before she knew it, he was kissing her.

He pressed his lips softly to hers, and she melted under his touch. It lasted only a moment, before he slowly pulled away to gauge her reaction.

She leaned back into him and kissed him firmly. She soon felt his lips move under hers, as he pulled her closer. She moved her hands down to his shoulders, feeling the wide expanse of his frame straining against his collared shirt and leaving the fabric tense and taught. She felt him shudder from her touch, as her hand tenderly grazed his chest.

Breathing a soft sigh, his tongue darted across her lower lip, this time causing her to shiver in pleasure. Pulling her head back, he moved his lips from her mouth to her jaw and down to her neck.

She struggled to formulate a thought, all she could feel was him. His lips, his hands. "James." He kept on kissing her earlobe and jaw as if he couldn't hear her. "James." She said again, this time lightly tugging his hair. Thank god, her hair was providing a curtain for the two, and they were standing in a quiet corner and away from prying eyes.

He looked at her with hooded eyes, and simply nodded when she said, "Hotel, now."

….

"Holy shit." She mumbled and very ungracefully stumbled back into Grant. James' eyes looked back at her in equal parts guilt and fear. What was he doing here? I thought he was a teacher in Canada? Joanna couldn't tear her eyes away from James, even as he regretfully turned his attention back to the rest of Dr Green's speech. She wanted to talk to him, needed to talk to him. And continued to question why he was here and what was happening even as Dr Green hurdled her and Grant outside and into the training room.

"So what I'll need you both to do is help me with the physical exams. The players can't get back on the ice for the season until they're medically optimized. So that means performing a full exam, making sure they're fit to play after a summer of being off." Dr green continued to discuss the day's events, and while she was tried to pay attention, she felt her mind wandering. She couldn't focus. She couldn't even breathe. What if James told someone about their time together in Spain? What was he doing here? Who was he? A million questions danced in her head, each demanding her attention.

"Here is a list of the team roster, and who each of you is expected to examine today," he said handing out a neat packet to both herself and Grant. "There are three training rooms, we'll each be in one. Joanna – you'll be first. I want you to talk to each player about their goals for the season, and discuss any issues from the last visit at the end of playoffs last year. Grant – I want you to do a basic exam on each player, and then I'll pretty much be reviewing things at the end."

Joanna took the carefully created sheet Dr. Green had prepared to her designated room. Quickly scanning the list to see if James was on it. She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that he had been left off. The thought had crossed her mind that he was a player when she saw him in that room, but he must be here for some other reason. But would she ever see him again? How would she find him? She was likely going to be locked away in the training room all day. But maybe, just maybe, life would be a hell of a lot easier if she never saw him again. Was it possible it wasn't him? Maybe she hallucinated? But despite her hesitancy, she knew that in her heart, it was him. James was here, in Pittsburgh. And she would have to get to the bottom of why.

…..

Joanna looked up when she heard a knocking on the door. Their had only been one player left to see, and Dr. Green had told her that since he was the captain of the team and the most pressed for his time and interviews, it would likely take him longer than the rest to make it down. It had been nearly half an hour since she saw the second to last player, and was reading a textbook on sports medicine when she heard the knocking.

She knew his name by heart. She had heard about him of course. Who hadn't? And as a Canadian herself, she was hardly oblivious to him. Despite the celebrity, she knew that she would never be able to pick him out a lineup if there ever was the opportunity.

She looked up ready to greet him.

"James?" she said incredulously. It was definitely James, she was sure of that. Same brown eyes, brown hair. The same body, she thought traitorously to herself.

He closed the door behind him with a soft thud. "We need to talk."

…...

"So you lied to me." She concluded, pacing around the small office space in tight circles. "Why?"

"Sometimes, I think the lie is an easier life to live." He said simply. He looked down at his shoes ashamed, unwilling to meet her eyes.

"I'm sorry, Joanna. I really am. I didn't think I would see you again, and even if I did," his eyes met hers with a pleading expression "I hoped it wouldn't be like this." He swallowed again before speaking "I'm in the public eye constantly, and under pressure from my coach, this franchise, and the fans to act a certain way... I guess what I'm trying to ask, is that you don't discuss what happened in Spain with anyone. Please." His voice cracked on the last word, indicating that he wasn't familiar with having to ask people for anything.

Joanna's mind was racing. The favour he was asking her was the same she was going to ask of James/Sidney whoever he was, when she saw him. And even though she was mad as hell, she simply nodded her head. "Sure. I have a job here too, it doesn't benefit me to have this out anymore than you. So I can forget it. If you can." She said the last words with a hopeful twist, hoping that he understood she had just as much at stake. But as she said them, she felt instant regret too. She didn't want to just forget about what happened. Just because her mind forgot, didn't mean that her body did. She still buzzed with electricity just being this close to him, and this was unlikely to fade fast.

Relief swept through his eyes. "Yes, thank you. Thank you so much." He made to shake her hand, but Joanna awkwardly bumped her legs against the sink as he did so, in an effort to back away from him quickly. Sensing hesitation on her end, he sat down resignedly on the exam table and shifted awkwardly in his seat. The tables had turned, she had the power in the room, and they both knew it.

Wringing her hands anxiously, she stood up and placed her white coat on. She usually never wore it, but today more than ever she needed the boundary of patient-doctor clear as a bell.

Despite trying his best to block out their past together, Sid was immediately overcome with a memory as she shrugged her coat on.

_They had just reached her hotel room. He could have left now, it would have been the gentlemanly thing to do. But she looked at him with desire burning in her eyes and whispered "stay" in his ear, sending a shiver down his spine, as she quickly opened the door to her room and they both rushed inside. _

_Her red dress sashayed ahead of him, as she abruptly turned and let him push her against the wall. She kissed him squarely on the mouth, as she began to furiously claw at the buttons on his shirt. Shrugging his shoulders, he let the abandoned clothing item fall to a heap on the floor. Never had he felt more wanted. _

…..

Feeling a little flustered, she rummaged around in the box of patient files on the floor until she found his. Self consciously, she sat down on the stool and swiveled around to face him. She crossed her legs and the hem of her knee length skirt slipped higher. Bringing his file down upon her lap, she looked up to see his eyes quickly avert away from her leg and back to her. His cheeks colouring only slightly.

Guess his body was having a tough time forgetting things too, she thought sourly to herself.

Joanna interviewed Sidney with clipped questions, and in turn neatly wrote everything he said, avoiding prolonged eye contact him throughout.

Sidney tried as best as he could to force himself to forget their night in Spain. But as he spoke, he couldn't help but stare at Joanna, remembering how beautiful he thought she was when they first met, and how beautiful she still was now. The guys who had their appointments with her earlier in the day, had told him she was knockout, "smoking body" they had said in the locker room, pleased that they were going to be spending the entire season with such a babe. Sidney had laughed along, but now, looking at her, he felt sad and disappointed with himself. With a gut wrenching sigh, he forced himself back to the present moment.

Enough distractions. The season was officially underway. And he intended to win.


	3. Chapter 3

"Hi Grant, what time are you getting to the party for?" Joanna shot out a quick text to him, as she finished brushing her teeth. Just as she was setting her phone down, she heard the quick chime of his reply.

"Just got here a few minutes ago. On your way?" Grant had written back.

Frazzled that she was late, Joanna took another peak at the time in the upper corner of her screen, 4:04pm blinked back at her. The pool party that Mr. Lemieux was throwing was starting at four. And Grant was already there? What happened to being fashionably late anymore? Knowing that it would take her another twenty minutes at least to get there, Joanna quickly texted a "yes, will be there soon" message as she hurried into her bedroom to get the rest of her things.

Quickly grabbing her keys and purse, while fixing her sunglasses on top of her head, she took one last glance at herself in her bathroom mirror before heading out. Light to virtually no makeup since she planned on swimming, leather jacket and cut off shorts overtop of her one-piece swimsuit. It was a pool party, so she knew people would be prancing around half naked, but it was still a work event for Joanna, and she wanted to appear professional. She buttoned her jacket all the way up in an effort to appear more covered, and then just as quickly shook her head and decided to leave it open. She was going to a pool party, I'm going to have to show _some_ skin, she thought to herself.

Without giving herself another moment to hesitate on outfit choices and run the risk of being late, she grabbed her keys and jumped into her car. Plugging in the address Grant had texted her the night before, she pulled out of her apartment complex. Driving had always helped to clear her head, and these days she had a lot on her mind. Her thoughts a constant jumble of thoughts. Ever since she had learned that James was Sidney, and all of the superstar baggage that his name brought with him, she had tried to keep him out of her thoughts. But somehow he had a way of creeping back in. The more she tried to tame her thoughts, the more she kept thinking about him. She had not seen him since that awkward day in the training room. He had kept a respectful distance from her, and she did the same. Neither one lingering in the same room any longer than necessary. But that still didn't stop the butterflies from fluttering in her stomach when she saw him, or from noticing when he looked at her. But they had promised each other to leave their past behind. And she had to keep looking forward. It was too painful to look back.

They had only spent one night together. To anyone, that was not an especially long amount of time. But even at the time, Joanna and Sidney had promised not to forget it. But here they were, forced to work together. Knowing that he was here, and he was just outside of her reach, made everything just so heartbreakingly painful. She didn't think she was in love with him, she didn't know him well enough for that. But she had been in lust with him in Spain, and that initial connection and spark had not faded. It wasn't love at first sight, Joanna didn't believe in things like that, but whatever they had, hadn't died. At least not for her. But her profession swore her to an oath. She was his doctor and he was her patient. End of story. There could be nothing more.

Likewise, he had made it very clear to her that day in the training room that he wanted nothing further either. Which made her reality all the more painful. She felt like she was pining after someone who hadn't given her another thought since that day in Madrid. Boys, what jerks, she thought to herself.

Joanna sighed to herself as she continued driving. This internal dialogue had been playing on an endless loop inside of her head for the last several days. She had examined things from a thousand different angles and perspectives. She had to move on. Learn to live with the butterflies and find some semblance of peace in his presence.

Pulling off the highway, Joanna patiently followed her GPS guide as she was directed to a quiet and elegant neighbourhood. "You have arrived at your destination," it spoke quietly but distinctly. Yes, she had, she thought to herself, as she stepped out of her car and took in her surroundings.

A beautiful house, no a mansion, stood in front of her. Sprawling, manicured lawns and large enough to house several bedrooms and bathroom she was sure. Just beyond her gaze she could see a number of people milling around a pool, and she knew she was in the right location as she walked closer and saw Grant and Dr. Green standing to the side of a large outdoor swimming pool. She glanced around and saw several young women in tiny bikinis and many of the penguins players shirtless. So much for feeling like I wasn't wearing enough clothing, she thought, as she hugged her jacket a little tighter around herself and walked towards the only two people that she really knew at the party.

Both Grant and Dr. Green were standing in a loose circle with three or four other guests. From her angle, Joanna couldn't make out whom they were with, but seeing as she didn't know anyone else here, she wasn't going to let that stop her from joining their conversation. Grant kindly caught her eye as she approached and gave her a warm smile. Turning his body away from the group, he reached out and gave her a big hug when she was close.

"So, what did you get?" He asked still holding onto her.

"How did you know my score came out?" she asked, feeling his lips turn into a smile against her cheek, as he pulled away to look at her.

"C'mon, just tell me!" he gave her a wide grin and nodded his head once, hoping to invite a response.

"Ok, fine! 248."

Before she knew it, Grant let out a soft whoop and had lifted Joanna of the ground. He gave her a small twirl before gently settling her down. Given her interactions with Grant before, and their usual serious nature, Joanna was more than surprised with his behaviour. But pleased nevertheless. She had worked so hard on that exam, and she had been ecstatic when she learned that she had done so well.

"Congrats" he said to her as he set her down. His eyes crinkling with genuine support.

"Thanks, Grant."

As both her and Grant turned back to the group, she noticed that all eyes were on her and Grant and there was a general silence in the group. As she looked around, she locked eyes with Sidney again. His face was carefully arranged in a neutral expression, but his eyes held more truth, a trace of disappointment flashed through them for a moment before he recovered.

"What's all this about?" Dr Green asked, looking between Joanna and Grant.

"She just scored a 99 on her board exam, Dr Green." Grant said, gesturing with his thumb at her, "she's going to have her pick of fellowships now."

Joanna couldn't help but smile widely when Grant said that, and also when Dr Green reached over and shook her hand firmly. "Congratulations Joanna, I'm so proud of you."

"Thank you both so much." Her momentary feeling of unease when she realized that Dr Green and Grant had been talking to Sidney, was replaced with warmth by the overt support the two had shown for her.

The three turned back to the group, as Sidney and none other than Mr. Lemieux himself looked at Joanna with curious expressions on their faces.

"I just passed my last board exam this week." She explained sheepishly and extended a hand to Mr. Lemieux "It's a pleasure to meet you, Sir. My name is Joanna, and I'm one of the doctors working with Dr Green this season."

He looked back at her with a small smile on his lips, "Very nice to meet you, Joanna," he said, "Please call me Mario, and I see congratulations are in order."

Joanna blushed, already feeling that too much of this conversation had been steered on her, said "Thank you" and waited for the conversation to be directed away.

Grant however did not share the same opinion, and said "She's being too modest, Mario. She couldn't have scored much higher than she did, and this gives her an excellent advantage when she's applying for sports fellowships next year. Dr Green and I will have a tough time competing with all of the other programs out there that will be sure to want her, and keep her here with us at UPMC."

"Well I certainly hope we get to keep such an intelligent physician like yourself," Mario looked back at Grant and Joanna with a warm smile. "Have you met Sidney yet, Joanna?"

Mario stepped back and gestured to Sidney, who had been silent throughout the entire exchange.

"Yeah we met last week," Sidney said in way of explanation. Sidney once again locked eyes on her, his brown eyes smoldering, and Joanna suppressed an involuntary shiver. Those damn butterflies were prancing around again.

Sidney casually turned to Dr Green asking a question about his elbow, whether to avoid her or not she wasn't sure, and Grant eagerly joined them. Mario looked thoughtfully at Joanna.

"Tell me about yourself, Joanna"

Feeling as if she were on a job interview, she looked weakly back at him. In many ways, it was a job interview. He was her boss in a sense. Maybe he didn't oversee her training in the same way as Dr Green, but he certainly was a commanding presence in all things Penguins and NHL related.

Joanna began talking about growing up in the suburbs of Toronto, going to New York for medical school. She glossed over the part about following a boy, and then about her time in Pittsburgh thus far – a handful of months so far – for residency. As she spoke, she felt herself growing more comfortable around him. He was easy to talk to, she thought surprisingly to herself. He listened carefully to her, asked thoughtful questions, and smiled encouragingly to her throughout.

She hadn't realized how much time had passed until she heard a faint ringing from within the depths of her bag and shot Mario an apologetic look. She fished around for her phone and saw that it was her grandparents calling. "I'm so sorry, but I think this is my Grandmother," she looked up at him again "So nice to meet you. And thank you for hosting, you have a lovely home." She flashed him a quick smile as she pulled the phone to her ear.

"Hi Gram," she said, turning away from him.

Mario gave her another thoughtful look at Sidney rejoined him.

"What do you think of the new doctor?" he asked his star player. Sidney was more than a player to Mario though, and in many ways, considered him to be as close as family. He respected Sidney's attitude on and off the ice, and knew that his endurance, perseverance and talent kept him at the top of his game. But somehow, he still wanted more for Sidney. His commitment to staying number one at all times, was starting to take a personal toll. What he had with his wife, he wanted for Sidney. Whenever the pressures of his own career had become too much, he knew that Natalie was there for him. She was his anchor, his endless source of patience and kindness. And while Sidney himself had a number of these qualities himself, Mario knew that he needed a life outside of the arena with someone who could keep him level headed and grounded.

"Only met her for a few minutes that day" Sidney said, shifting his eyes from Mario to the ground, simultaneously shrugging his shoulders. "Why?"

"Now Sid, I know you don't like when I try to give you advice on your personal life," Mario said

Sidney looked up at his mentor with surprise, and for a moment his heart spluttered and paused. Did Mario suspect something? Had he found out somehow? Sidney prepared to defend his actions immediately when Mario continued "But that's the kind of girl you need in your life. She's smart, independent, grounded." Sidney's heart went from a momentary pause to full blown palpitations. "Just some food for thought" he said knocking his beer bottle gently against Sidney's before he turned away.

…...

Joanna spent the rest of the party with Grant, their legs dangling in the pool as they sat side-by-side people watching.

The people here were just so beautiful she thought. The players walked around casually, mingling with each other as their muscles rippled in the sunlight even doing something as simple as twisting open a beer. Sidney was no exception. With his shirt off, his chiseled muscles glowed in the sunlight bouncing off his hair and back and arms.

The players' girlfriends and wives stood beside them all, equally stunning and beautiful. In their barely there bikinis, looking as toned and in shape as if they had stepped out of a Sports Illustrated catalogue. Feeling more at home with Grant on the fringe of this new race of humans, Joanna talked more with him than she had ever done before. She usually felt so out of place with him. He was just so smart, she usually felt like she could never keep up with him. But today Grant talked little about medicine, and it felt more like a conversation between friends than colleagues. When a lull peaked in their conversation, Grant stood up and offered Joanna a hand, "Swim?" he asked her.

Joanna took his hand, and peeled off her jacket, tossing it behind her before she turned back to Grant.

His eyes roamed over her, and Joanna caught his eye as he finished drinking her in. He didn't even blush or look guilty, but more with the eyes of a man that liked what he saw and who wasn't afraid to let her know that.

Her breath hitched in her throat for a second, before she recovered and knocked her shoulder playfully against his. "Race to the other end?"

In reply, Grant grabbed her and they both fell sideways into the pool sending a fine spray of water over the half a dozen supermodel wives/girlfriends who had been huddled only feet away from them. A few of them shrieked as their hands went up to cover themselves from the spray, "my hair!" one said, as she frantically tried to smooth away the water that had fallen over the perfectly sculpted locks. Joanna surfaced from the water, giving Grant a shove as he too surfaced next to her. She gestured with a nod of her head to the group of women.

Grant took in their appearance – some had mascara running down their faces – while the rest glared back at the two of them.

If looks could kill…

Grant said a brief "My apologies, ladies" before he turned back to Joanna. "Now about that race?"

Joanna momentarily paused at the sight of the women, still shooting daggers in their direction at Grant's half assed apology, but when she saw that huge smile dancing across his face she turned her full attention back to him.

She answered him by ducking her head back into the water. Pushing off aggressively, she attempted to keep her lead on Grant before he could catch up.

….

Sidney couldn't help but glance over at Joanna. She had been talking to that sports med doc Grant all day, and the two seemed to be hitting it off. Sidney couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy shoot through him. It was unfamiliar to him. Sure he had been jealous before. Like when another team won the Stanely Cup, or another player beat him for the Hart. But this was a different type of jealousy. His other losses fueled him, he took the losses as motivation to be better. He felt helpless as he looked over at Joanna, as Grant flirted shamelessly with her.

Grant's eyes as he looked her up and down like a sleaze. His hands as he pulled her into the water. His goofy smile as he watched her swim away from him, and those hands of his again as he pulled her into him for a victory hug when she won their race.

Sidney forced himself to turn away from them. He made the decision to focus on his career this season, he thought firmly to himself. When he had seen her face in the orientation meeting that day, he had panicked. His summer self, James, had not meant to travel beyond Spain. He had even used his old teammate's name and part of his persona when he met Joanna. He didn't expect for any of that to mix with his other world. And when it did, he felt his walls crashing down around him. The only solution he had come up was to pretend like it never happened, it was only the way out he could see.

But now looking back at Joanna and Grant, he wondered helplessly if there had been another solution that he had not acknowledged. Refused to acknowledge. And that was to be with her. Mario's words churned around his head, "That's the kind of girl you need."

As he looked across the pool to the group of WAGs still huddled in a protective circle, frantically talking and gesturing to Grant and Joanna with looks fueled by hatred, Sidney couldn't help but cringe. Those girls weren't what he wanted. And certainly weren't what he needed.

With a sinking feeling, Sidney realized that it was too late. He was too late. He had no one else to blame but himself, and the words that he just couldn't say.

…...

Joanna and Grant walked back to her car in companionable silence. "Well today was fun." He said to her as they slowed and Joanna reached for her keys.

"Yeah, it was. Even when we splashed those girls." She laughed, and Grant laughed along with her.

As she unlocked her SUV doors, Joanna took a step towards the car and then turned back to Grant. She opened her mouth to say bye, when he stepped in towards her. His right hand came up around her head as he leaned his body against her car, effectively enveloping her within his reach.

The sun was setting behind them, lighting up the Lemieux house like a portrait. The brilliant orange and yellow hues hitting Grant's hair. Joanna couldn't help but think back to the fountain light show with Sidney in Spain.

"I wanted you to know," Grant began saying, as Joanna wrenched her eyes from the sunset and back to his, "That I broke up with my girlfriend."

Joanna slowly exhaled a breath that she didn't realize she had been holding. "Just something to think about." Grant said, as he brushed a light fingertip against her jaw before letting it fall. He flashed her another breathtaking smile as he moved away from her.

_Thank you to everyone who has been reading this! It's my first time posting anything like this, so very much appreciate any reviews/comments/thoughts you may have! _


	4. Chapter 4

The season had officially begun, and the team had already played two back-to-back games opening the season at home. Tonight they were flying out to Florida. Dr Green wanted either Joanna or Grant to cover each away game, and seeing that Grant was higher on the totem pole, he would be flying out with the team first. This also meant that Joanna would have to attend the team's morning practice skate by herself and be around for any issues that could potentially arise.

Opening her eyes to the bright sunlight streaming through her window, Joanna turned and saw that she had an hour before she needed to be awake. For most, that meant rolling over and trying to squeeze in some more sleep. But being a morning person at heart, she began to getting dressed. An extra hour, meant an extra hour to study_! I'm turning into such a loser, _she thought to herself, as she tossed a few reading materials into her bag. The drive to Consol was a quiet one, hardly any cars on the road. And in just a few short minutes, she was pulling into the employee parking lot. Scanning around, she took in a few other cars parked nearby, but otherwise virtually empty. The training room had become her favourite place to study, here she was able to fully tune out and zone into her books. She was lucky that she could find such relief, because these days, so much of her life was a mess. Joanna wasn't used to things being in such chaos and feeling so out of control; that must be part of the OCD/Type A personality that so many doctors carried with them she mused. So when she was able to put the blinders on and focus on something else, she took the opportunity.

Her nose had been in the books for a solid half hour when she heard a faint knock on the training room door. Having finished the page she was on, and recapping her highlighter, she crossed the room quickly and opened the door.

Sidney.

"Hi, c'mon in" Joanna said lamely, gesturing for him to take a seat on one of the exam tables.

Sidney looked surprised to see her there, and took a few hesitant steps into the room while glancing around, "Dr Green here?" he asked in way of greeting.

"Sorry, no" she said, hugging her arms across her chest. "Anything I can do for you?" Realizing that she probably didn't have the most inviting posture, she uncrossed her arms and took a seat on the stool next to the exam table he had chosen.

_I have to get used to this, she thought. He's my patient. We're both adults. Get a grip!_ But she was finding it hard to focus, and she stumbled a little as she took her seat. What was it about him that made her feel like such a mess?

Sidney still looking shaken that it was just her, merely shrugged his shoulders and pointed to his right knee. "Been acting up a little, could you take a look at it before practice?"

"Yeah, of course." She looked up at him and gave him a small smile.

Sidney's heart leapt a little as she smiled up at him. A genuine smile. To say that things had been awkward between them was an understatement, but he wanted to make things right. Seeing her with Grant had been strange, and he found himself feeling jealous too. She was making the effort and being professional, he had to keep up his end of the bargain as well.

She asked him to lie down, and manipulated his legs into a bent position, carefully feeling around his knee for any painful spots and areas of weakness. He merely looked at her skilled hands while she worked. It kept his attention away from the way her hair fell in soft waves down her back, or how her lips puckered in concentration. Lips that he had once known the taste and feel of.

He was jerked out of his thoughts, as a shrill beeping erupted from across the room. Unsure where the noise was coming from, he tried scanning the room for the source. Joanna appeared more confident. Quickly striding over, Joanna fished out a small black beeper from the pocket of her coat and headed over to the phone. Frowning at the message, she looked up at Sidney. "Sorry, this is the hospital. I have to take this, just give me a minute."

"Hi this is Dr. Brant returning a page," she said clearly and distinctly into the phone, after listening for a moment and consulting with a neatly folded stack of papers she had in her pocket, she chirped out a quick "Ok, let's give him an extra 5mg Hydralazine. Just give me a page back if there are any other issues. Thanks"

Pocketing her beeper, she turned back again to Sidney. "Sorry" she said apologetically. She flashed him another smile, placing her hands on his knee again, "Where was I?" she mumbled before straightening out his leg.

Though Sidney had promised himself to keep things strictly hockey only when it came to her, he couldn't help but let his curiosity get the better of him. "What was that for?" he asked. And for the first time that day, he looked her straight in the eyes. Wow, she had beautiful eyes. He had forgotten that. He hadn't been this close to her in months. But now, he could smell her soft perfume and as he inhaled, and felt it wash over his senses.

"That was the.. um.. hospital." She said, looking as equally off kilter as he felt. "A patient with high blood pressure."

Sidney felt disappointed as she pulled her hands away and looked down at her shoes for a moment before glancing up at him, "Your knee looks fine. Nothing some ice and rest between practice and tonight's game won't fix." She turned away to wash her hands, and Sidney couldn't help but feel like she was giving up on him.

"Jo."

She looked up at him, hey eyes widening in surprise and hope and fear.

"Is there anything else I can do?" he asked, getting off the exam table. He knew that his question was laced with a thousand different meanings. He stood unsteadily and took a deep breath in, unsure of his footing in that moment.

She looked up at him with sad eyes, and a moment of silence passed between them.

"Well I would say to take it easy and to see how things go, but I know that's not really an option for you, since you have to be at your best at all times. So I suppose," she swallowed, as if the weight of her words were too much to bear, "that you just need to focus and know that it's ok to play tonight and move on."

She wasn't just talking about hockey. With him, it was never just about the game. She took a few shaky breaths while she tried to compose herself, and reached above her head in the cabinet for his file and began documenting his visit.

Sidney stood morosely and wordlessly behind her. This couldn't be it. He couldn't let this be it. He reached out a hand, her name on his lips, when he heard a knock on the ajar training room door.

Joanna quickly whipped her head around, and Sidney dropped his hand just as fast, when he saw Tanger waiting in the doorway.

"Can I come in?" Kris asked. The question was directed at Joanna, but his eyes were on Sidney when he asked. The hesitancy clear in Kris' posture and face. "Or should I come back?"

He had seen them, Sidney thought. What Kris had heard, he wasn't sure. But he had definitely seen them.

Joanna looked at Sidney, and cleared her throat. "We're finished." She took a step away from him and towards Kris, "Sidney was just leaving, come on in Kris."

…

"Everything ok?" she ushered Kris over to the table Sidney had vacated only moments before

"I feel terrible." He said, gasping for small breaths of air in between words. Now looking at him more closely, she saw that he was struggling to breathe. She had been too engrossed in the moment with Sidney to notice at first. She kicked herself for not paying more attention to Kris. He looked back at her, and she noticed he was pale, and had a sheen of sweat on his forehead. Feeling momentarily terrified, Joanna reached for her stethoscope and slid it across her neck.

"What happened?"

"I went to sleep last night feeling fine, and I woke up in the middle of the night feeling like I couldn't breathe. I couldn't sleep at all because I couldn't take a deep breath. And then this morning, no change." He breathed out the last few words as if in a rush, but she knew it was more than likely that he didn't feel like he had any more air left in him.

Rummaging through the drawers behind her, she found the small instrument she was looking for and slipped it around his index finger. The numbers fluctuated for a moment, but eventually settled. Heart Rate: 132, SpO2: 83%.

Pulling her stethoscope to her ears and across Kris' chest, she could hear his heart bounding, and his lungs clear as a bell. She quickly asked Kris a few more questions about his symptoms, before reaching for the landline phone behind her.

"I'm sorry Kris, but you need to go to the emergency department right now. I'm calling for an ambulance."

…..

The ambulance had taken them to the closest UPMC affiliate to the arena, and as it pulled up to the front doors of the emergency room, she jumped out and helped Kris down the steps. A wheelchair was waiting for him, and she quickly signed out his case to one of the supervising doctors while she took a seat with Kris in his room.

He looked anxious, as blood was rapidly drawn from his veins, IV placed, and he was hooked up to a series of monitors. Joanna reached out and took his hand in hers. "Kris, you're in the best place you could be right now. Do not be worried. I have to call Dr Green to update him, but who can I call for you? Is there any family I can on your behalf?"

Kris gave her a weak smile as he asked her to call his girlfriend Catherine. Joanna quietly stepped out his room and drew the curtain behind her as she pulled out her cellphone and called her. She was understandably shocked by the turn of events, but said that she would be there soon. Next, Joanna called Dr Green. He took the news surprisingly well, and felt that Joanna had done the right thing by taking him to the ER.

Meanwhile Kris had been taken for a CAT scan of his lungs, and Joanna waited patiently in his empty room. She would be lying if she said she wasn't scared for him. There were really only a few reasons that someone's oxygen saturation would drop that low, and none of them were very good.

She heard a quiet and persistent buzz, and looked over to see Kris' phone light up on the empty bed with an incoming call. Looking over to make sure it wasn't Catherine, Joanna saw Sidney's name flash across the phone.

Just seeing his name made her nervous. Taking another deep breath, she swiped her index finger across the screen to unlock Kris' phone.

"Hey Sidney, its Joanna." She said.

"Hi. I just found out he went to the hospital. Called as soon as I had a chance to get off the ice." He said breathing hard on the other end. She felt a swoop in her stomach at the sound of his voice.

"What happened? Is he alright?"

She updated him on the situation, and she could hear the concern in his voice radiating down the line to her. "He'll be okay." She said quietly, "I know he will." She suddenly felt braver than she had before. And for a moment, it was just about Kris. Two people talking normally, their past forgotten. Talking like real friends would.

"Yeah, hope so" Sidney said resignedly. "Just take down my phone number, will you? Call or text me with any updates."

"Yeah of course." She said as she entered his number into her own phone.

"We'll be flying out in an hour, so I may not be able to reply to things, but just keep me posted on whatever is happening. Anytime of the day."

She heard footsteps, and looked up as one of the ER doctors poked his head behind the curtain. "Listen I have to go, but I'll call you later. Good luck tonight."

"Thanks. And Joanna? Just.." his voice broke off for a moment, "take care of him for me, will you?" He said quietly.

"I will." She ended the call, her heart breaking a little at the thought of Sidney so upset.

"Turns out you were right – clot in the lungs." The ER physician said, nodding over at her, "He's being admitted to the hospital."

Joanna's heart sank. Knowing the greater meaning of what those words meant. Kris would be out of the game for six months at least. A huge blow to the Penguins organization, and of course Kris himself.

She nodded as he left, and sat down on Kris' hospital bed and waited for him to return. Pulling out her cellphone, her finger hesitated over Sidney's name in her contacts. She pressed a few more buttons on the screen and she saw herself staring at a blank message with Sidney's name scrolled across the top.

"Hi its Joanna." She began writing, "Kris is going to be fine. But he's being admitted to the hospital. I'll fill you in on the details later. Have a safe flight and good game tonight."

Mere seconds later, Sidney had written back, "Thanks Jo. I'll call you after the game."

…..

Joanna finished brushing her teeth and climbed into bed, running through the day's events in her head. Kris had been admitted to the hospital and was started on blood thinners. She had waited until Catherine had arrived, updated her on everything, and then waited again until Kris had returned from radiology and was officially admitted. The whole process had taken a very long time. As she had driven home, she couldn't help but fiddle around on the radio dial until she found what she had been looking for. The penguins broadcast on sports radio. They had ended up winning 4-1 against the panthers, and she smiled to herself as she put her things away and made her lunch for the next day. She may not have started off as a huge fan, but it was her team now, and she was happy that they had won. Her smile may have had to do with that, but it probably had to do more with the fact that she knew Sidney would be calling her later.

She waited about an hour. She didn't want to be _that _girl, but as she finished washing the dishes, putting away her laundry, and checking her email, she didn't have any more excuses to be awake. Settling down in her bed, she plugged in her phone to charge for the night, when it began ringing.

"Hey Sidney" she said, glancing briefly at the caller ID before picking up.

"Hi, sorry for calling so late."

"No, its fine. Congratulations on your win!"

"Thanks." And she could almost feel his smile, "Didn't feel the same without him. How is he?"

Joanna explained Kris' diagnosis, and what would happen from here on out. Sidney took the news in stride. "It happens, and the team has had its fair share of guys getting sick. Tell Tanger I'll drop by when I'm back in town."

Silence fell between them, pregnant with uncertainty.

Sidney felt suddenly emboldened. Maybe it was because he had just come off a win. Or maybe it was because for the first time since Spain, they were truly alone. Finally away from the prying eyes of Mario, Tanger, and Grant. He cradled his phone to his ear, the only sound in his hotel room, was that of his heavy breathing.

"Thank you for everything with Kris today." Before she could answer, he rushed on. "And I'm sorry about everything. About Spain, and about how I handled things here. You deserve better than that. And I'd like to start over, if you'd let me."

Joanna paused in mid-thought. Too much had happened between them, and she didn't want to forget Spain. Whoever Sidney had been in that moment, she didn't want to forget. It was this new version of him that she was still getting used to: the one that was a superstar in this adopted country and in her native one.

"I'd like that," she said sincerely.

"Well let's start now." As Sidney said it, he felt some of the tension he had been holding leave him as he lay back on his hotel bed and closed his eyes. "So how was your day?"

Joanna settled into the pillows propped up on her bed at the same time as Sidney. Mirroring his posture, even though they were miles away.

"Well apart from taking out one of your star defenseman for the next six months, it was great." She laughed.

Sidney laughed along with her. And for the first time since she had met him again in Pittsburgh, Joanna felt at peace.


	5. Chapter 5

Her car hummed along, as she drove out of the city and merged onto another highway. This highway she would be on for a while, at least another 90 minutes.

Kris had been released from the hospital two weeks ago, and just as she had predicted, was going to be on blood thinners for another few months. She had been pleasantly surprised with the class shown by the entire Penguins organization during the entire ordeal. A press conference was held shortly after Kris has been released, and with his coach, fellow teammates on hand, and Dr Green, Grant and herself in attendance, Kris had gracefully explained to the media and his fans that he would be taking a brief leave from hockey.

Afterwards, Catherine had found Joanna, and with tears shining in her eyes had thanked her for her help. And since then, Joanna had struck up an unlikely friendship with Kris and Catherine. They had invited her over for dinner twice, and each time she had thoroughly enjoyed herself and their company. She still felt uneasy about things though. It had been ingrained in her from a very early start in her medical career, not to have personal relationships with her patients. And having dinner at their house, was certainly going against everything she had been taught. And yet when she was there – laughing and having a good time with them – she thought back to how lonely it had been for her these last few months, moving to a new city where she knew no one other than Sidney, who had been less than welcoming. It was then, that she would squash these thoughts and continue doing what made her feel happy. Which was why she was driving nearly two hours outside of the city to spend the weekend with Kris, Catherine and a few of their friends in the couple's cottage.

To his credit, Kris also hadn't said anything further about what her and Sidney had been talking about in training room that day when he had walked in pale and short of breath. For that alone, she knew she could trust Kris, and that went a long way in her books.

Pulling up to a beautiful cottage, overlooking a lake, Joanna couldn't help but think that being friends with a millionaire could have its perks too. She turned off her headlights, and began gathering her overnight bag from the trunk. The only sounds around her were that of soft chirping crickets and lightly hooting birds from the trees surrounding the property. Despite the seclusion, the house itself was lit up – every room seemed to have lights on, and she could hear laughter and voices echoing down to her. Whoever was inside, seemed to be having a good time. Counting two other cars in the driveway, she began walking up to the front door, and rang the doorbell.

Catherine opened it, looking bright eyed, "Joanna, so glad to see you!" she said wrapping her up in a big hug, "Kris, get the grill going" she yelled.

"Sorry I'm late." Joanna said, shrugging out of her fall jacket.

"Don't worry about it, we know you work late" Catherine said casually, "Just leave your stuff in the hall, Kris assigned rooms earlier, so he'll tell you which one is yours."

Joanna dropped her bags where she stood and followed Catherine inside to the kitchen. Catherine helped herself to a beer and handed one to Joanna too.

"So who else is here? You didn't say before." Joanna said, just before she knocked her bottle against Catherine's and said cheers.

Catherine shrugged her shoulders, "No one you don't already know, just some boys from the team."

Joanna felt her grip slacken on her drink and just barely managed to avoid dropping it. "Yeah?" she said trying to appear nonchalant. "Who?"

Catherine looked up from the tomatoes she was slicing, "Marc and his wife, Sidney, and now you." She said smiling.

Great, an entire weekend with Sidney. With nowhere to go. What sounded like a dream come true to any red blooded woman, was quickly turning into her personal nightmare.

Though she could now safely say that Sidney and her were on friendly terms, there was still plenty of unfinished business between them. And she had a sinking feeling that things would quickly come to a head this weekend.

Catherine stopped what she was doing and gave her a sympathetic smile. Her expression saying more than her words. Kris and her had clearly talked about what he had seen.

"Is that okay?" she said

She could say what she was thinking, which was that it was totally inconsiderate and inappropriate to invite her and Sidney to what was clearly a couple's weekend, when things were so muddled between them to begin with. Or she could say what was socially acceptable. She chose the latter. For the first time in months, she had friends in Kris and Catherine, and she wasn't going to rock the boat.

"Yeah of course. We're both adults. What could happen?"

…

After Catherine had mentioned Sidney was there, Joanna had squared her shoulders and went to greet everyone in the backyard. Sidney seemed unsurprised to see her there, and reached up to give her a hug just like everyone else had done. And though his behaviour was no different than the rest, she still felt a brief frisson of electricity flow through her at his touch.

Friends. Just friends. She said to herself.

She was then introduced to Marc's wife, Vero, and the three girls took their seats at the kitchen table while the men stood outside grilling. It felt very 1950s, but the girls all enjoyed not having to cook for a change. Dinner was another messy affair, as the other guests quickly coupled off, leaving Sidney and Joanna standing awkwardly at the dinner table.

"Sid, take a seat," Kris said pointing at the chair to his left. "Joanna, you can sit beside him." Sensing a set up at hand, Joanna looked up at Kris as he gave her a wide grin and winked. Her suspicions confirmed.

It may have started off awkwardly, but as the conversation and drinks flowed, Joanna felt herself relaxing. Even pulling Sidney into a few private jokes and conversations, she could feel Kris looking over at the two of them like a proud father. She managed to suppress the urge to roll her eyes at him. Talking to Sidney over dinner felt comfortable and easy, and she could see her thoughts echoed on his face. He found their conversation effortless too, and the pace was refreshing.

Following dinner, Catherine and Kris were eager to get everyone in the hot-tub. _I've already been in my swimsuit way too much around these people!_ Joanna thought as she walked towards the hallway where she had left her bags.

"Hey Catherine, where can I get changed?" she said, calling over her shoulder as she scooped down to pick up her things.

Kris sauntered over to her and flashed another wicked grin. "Oh you're going to love your quarters, Dr Brant," he said lifting his eyebrows conspiratorially.

"Am I?" she said, returning his eyebrow lift, "Somehow I doubt that with you."

Kris opened the door to a large bedroom, equipped with a queen size bed, walk in closet and flat screen TV. Taking a few steps into the room, she turned back to Kris, feeling suddenly suspicious, "What's the catch?"

Kris merely grinned at her and walked over to a second door. She could only assume this was the bathroom, everything else was already accounted for. Kris knocked loudly on the door, and stood back to watch Joanna's expression.

Slowly opening the door, stood a shirtless Sidney Crosby. Joanna felt her mouth go dry as she took him in. Sidney looked equally surprised. He crossed his arms in front of him, his biceps bulging as he did so.

Joanna quickly dropped her eyes from Sidney and looked at Kris again. _What the hell?_

Kris looked back at her, his eyes dancing with laughter.

"Well you see," Kris said, leaning his frame against the doorway and stretching his arms out leisurely behind his head, "It's a four bedroom place. One for me and Cat, one for Marc and Vero, and two for you. It just so happens that your two bedrooms are connected. I hope that won't be a problem?" he said looking innocently between them.

Joanna looked from Sidney to Kris, and back at Sidney. He shrugged his shoulders at her, and she read his body language as if it were a script.

"It's fine." She said, turning back to Kris.

"Yeah" said Sidney, looking at Joanna. "It's just for sleeping." He said. But his gaze lingered on Joanna's long enough for her to second guess everything.

Friends. Friends. Friends! It was quickly becoming her new mantra.

…

"Okay. Joanna – your turn, truth or dare." Kris said, turning his mischievous eyes on her.

"I can't believe we're playing this! I mean, how old are we?!" she said.

Kris merely narrowed his eyes at her. He already been forced to do several embarrassing dares, and he wasn't about to let someone get away with not playing.

"Okay," she said, pausing to take another sip of her beer as she contemplated her options. Truth could be tough in a hot tub full of relative strangers. But she wasn't brave enough to do a dare with strangers either, especially after she had seen the intensity with which the others played. This was a not a game for the weak, especially not the way these guys played it!

"Truth"

Kris rubbed his hands together, as if he was trying to concoct the most embarrassing and out-of-this-world question for her. She looked up in time to see his eyes shift from Sidney to her, and she felt the mood around her change with his gaze.

"What's going on between you and Grant?"

Wow, okay, cutting right to the chase. And not so much embarrassing, as very personal.

There was a pause in the group. Almost as if everyone was straining to hear her answer.

"Nothing." She said, looking up at Kris.

"Nothing?" he echoed back at her skeptically.

"We're both colleagues and working under Dr Green, and that's it. Honestly." She could sense that this wasn't enough information for his liking, when Kris continued to stare her down, "I think Grant is an amazing doctor. He's intelligent, caring, well spoken, kind…" Suddenly realizing how that all sounded, she struggled to elaborate, "..and he's the doctor that I want to be down the road. But that's it. I have so much respect for him, but that's all there ever was between us."

She looked over at Sidney when she was done. The words may have been spoken to Kris, but everyone there knew that they were for him.

"So what about what happened at Mario's?" Sidney said, finally breaking the silence. He looked down at the water bubbling around his chest as he said it.

"We didn't know anyone else there." Joanna said, "You would have done the same thing, and spent the entire time with the only person you knew."

"That's not what I meant." Sidney said, shaking his head before looking up, "At the end of the party, when you were at your car."

Flashbacks of Grant stroking her face as he whispered to her about breaking up with his girlfriend flashed in front of Joanna. She didn't realize that Sidney had seen that. And suddenly things made a little more sense.

In Sidney's eyes, she was flirting with him one minute and then with Grant the next. Blowing hot and cold. No wonder she kept getting mixed signals from him, because he was giving as good as he got.

"Grant made it clear to me that day that if I wanted to pursue things with him, he was open to it. And to be perfectly honest, I've been avoiding him since then." She said slowly, carefully choosing her words as she was saying them. "Because the truth of it is, he's not what I'm after."

…..

Used to being up early, Joanna had woken up before everyone else and felt like going for a run. Pulling on a pair of athletic leggings, and long sleeved shirt, she was sitting on the bathroom floor lacing her sneakers when the adjoining door opened.

Sidney stood there, wiping the sleep from his eyes, bare chested again. As he took the time to rub at his eyes, Joanna freely ogled him. It should be a sin for this man to not wear clothes, she thought to herself.

"What are you up to?" he said, now seeing that she was fully dressed and on her way out.

"I wanted to go for a run." She said, standing up and pulling her long hair into a high ponytail on the back of her head.

"Mind if I join you?" he asked

She hesitated. She had pretty much declared that she liked him last night. Afterwards, they had continued playing the game until everyone had a few turns, and gone to bed shortly thereafter. She felt his eyes on her a few times when he thought she wasn't looking, but that had been it. No words said, no hint of communication, no nothing. To say she wasn't disappointed would be a lie.

Long afterwards she had lain awake in her bed, secretly hoping and fearing that he would steal into her room. If he had, she wouldn't have stopped him. But when it came to Sidney, she just couldn't predict him. She had laid her cards out on the table, so why hadn't he made a move yet?

She mumbled an incoherent yes and told him she'd be outside while he got ready. The crisp autumn air nipped at her, as she took a few steps towards the dock. She stretched for a few minutes, but mostly just sat and watched the water waiting for Sidney.

Sidney took his time getting dressed and walking out to meet her. He still felt shy around her, even after all this time. In Spain she had seen a side to him that he rarely let show - carefree, spontaneous, light hearted. That was who he wanted to be, but couldn't. The demands of his career and the pressures placed on him from all angles, and at such a young age prevented him for being that way. And in turn, he put up a huge wall when it came to anything personal. She had broken through that barrier once, and she was trying to do it again. But would he let her? He wanted her to, that was for sure.

The fact that Grant was out of the picture, for now at least, made him smile. He could handle the competition, but knowing that he didn't have any, made the whole thing that much sweeter. Still, he couldn't help but feel that Grant was the _better_ choice for her. She could have a normal life with someone like Grant, and that was the one thing Sidney couldn't give her. In so many ways, he didn't feel that he deserved her. She was everything he wanted, and everything he knew he shouldn't have. With him, her life would be analyzed, scrutinized, and publicized. He could never freely take her to the movies, dinner, or any normal activity couples did. He would be away from her half of the year, and who in their right mind, would want a part-time boyfriend? She _deserved_ better, and he should stay away from her, because he _knew_ better.

But as he walked towards her, and she looked up at him, with a smile on her face, his heart paused. He should stay away from her, of that he was certain. But he still wasn't sure if he could.

…..

_Thanks for the reviews, they make my day! Please keep them coming :) And happy holidays to everyone too!_


	6. Chapter 6

"Ladies and gentlemen please takes your seats and fasten your seatbelts as we prepare for descent into Toronto."

Joanna looked excitedly though the window, and the saw her hometown spread out beyond the plane's wingtip. She hadn't been back in several months, and while she tried her best to keep in touch with her family back home regularly, there really was no comparison to actually seeing them in person. The team was getting into the city with a free night ahead of them before playing the Leafs the next day, and the Senators after that.

It was also her friend Heather's birthday, and for the first time in several years she was actually going to be in town for it. As soon as it was safe to turn on her phone she was texting the birthday girl about plans for tonight. Heather was a true party girl, and she had already made plans to check out one of the newest clubs in the city. Normally Joanna avoided stuff like that, but she hadn't had a night out in a while, and she was excited to catch up with her friends.

"Hey Heather, so excited for later! Just touched down in TO, will grab a cab soon." She typed into her phone

Within moments, Heather had already texted her back, "Yay! Front door's open. Did you check bags?"

Joanna was texting her back when she felt a hand on her elbow. Looking around, she saw Marc leaning over her shoulder and looking down at her phone.

"I take it you're not coming back to the hotel with us." He frowned, gesturing at her phone, "So what are your plans? Am I invited to the party?"

Joanna felt herself smiling up at Marc. He was married with a young child at home, somehow she doubted that he still loved crashing parties. But he was on the road so often, he must need to let off steam somehow. Plus, he really was a blast to hang out with. "I don't know about a party, but it's my friend's birthday and we're going to a club tonight. Want to come?"

"Yeah maybe, I'll ask some of the guys. Text me with your plans."

"Sure." She nodded back at him, and he shuffled along behind her as they slowly deplaned and left the airport terminal. As the rest of the team veered left and began climbing onto a waiting coach bus, Joanna waited patiently at the exit doors for the taxi she had just called.

"Jo! Bus is this way" Sidney was calling out to her as he boarded the bus, wearing a puzzled expression.

"I'm meeting my friend." She yelled back in way of explanation.

Marc joined Sidney on the threshold, "We'll see you later tonight though. There won't even be enough time to miss us!" he shot her a playful smile as he shoved a still puzzled Sidney onto the bus.

Laughing to herself, she made a quiet catalogue of the things she had to do in the next few hours. Wash hair, write in birthday card, buy cake. She had been looking forward to this trip for weeks, and now that she was officially back in Canada, and also knowing that she would be seeing Sidney later, her excitement was quickly reaching a new level.

….

"You invited who?" Heather, the birthday girl, was livid. "Who the hell are they? Some random guys you met at work?"

"No, no. I told you, they're hockey players. Like real NHLers. They're really sweet, and I bet a few of them are single who are coming." She pleaded. Joanna hadn't exactly thought this part of the plan through. Sidney had texted her an hour ago, informing her that he and some of their teammates would indeed be making an appearance. Now the tricky part would be breaking it to Heather.

"But it's my birthday! And I wanted a girls night," she pouted. Her sculpted eyebrows and painted lips knitted into a cross expression.

"And it's her birthday and she can cry if she wants to." Lisa said, the most sane one of them all. She came up behind Heather and gave her a big hug. "C'mon Heather, live a little. You only turn 26 once, now stop being such a cry baby and recognize the good deed Jo just did. She invited guys, hot rich guys to your party. Just for you."

"Yeah, ok" Heather sniffled a little, but seemed momentarily appeased.

Sid and Marc better be bringing some hot bachelors to this thing, Joanna mused. "But Sidney's off limits" she said absent-mindedly to her reflection in the mirror as she adjusted her hair.

"Sorry, who's Sidney?" gushed Heather, obviously having recovered from her hissy fit only moments before.

"Ah, no one." And realizing that she was in a losing battle, quickly surrendered to Heather's inquisitive stare. "He's just one of the guys I've been texting back and forth a bit about this thing. And uh.. you can have any of the players tonight, just not him. For once, I'm calling dibs, girls." She barely got out the words before blushing again

"Well how will I know which one he is? I mean, I don't watch hockey."

"It'll be obvious. He'll be the best looking one there." Joanna said, before blushing again. Over her head in the mirror, she could see Lisa and Heather exchanging looks.

"Are you talking about Sidney Crosby?" Lisa said incredulously

"Maybe." Joanna said coyly, looking up at Lisa with a small smile

Lisa paused, clearly not expecting her to confirm what she had been thinking. "And how the hell did that happen?"

"He's James."

Heather audibly gasped. "What?"

Joanna sighed before quickly filling them in.

"Jo," Lisa said resting a comforting hand on her shoulder "Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Me and Sidney?" she said

Lisa nodded in affirmation. "Honestly," Joanna continued, "I don't know. But all I can think about these days is Spain, and how he makes me feel. I haven't felt a spark like this since Andy."

"Aw sweetie." Heather said, giving her a big hug. "Has it really been that long? You broke up with Andrew two years ago."

Joanna hugged Heather back before loosening her grip and nodding back at her. Andrew had been her boyfriend back in college. She has foolishly followed him to New York and the two had broken up only eighteen months into medical school. In so many ways he had been her first real love, and had also been so difficult to get over. Nowadays, he was a surgical resident still living in NYC, and Joanna hadn't spoken to him in several months.

She fell silent for a moment, before suddenly shaking her head. She didn't want to think about Andy anymore, he was in her past. And tonight was about Heather.

"Lets go, shall we ladies? Don't want to be late for our own party!" Joanna hooked her arms through her best friends' and waltzed out the door of Heather's apartment.

….

It was like in a movie when two characters' eyes meet across the room. Just like that. For Heather and Brandon Sutter that is.

Brandon sauntered into the crowded club with quite the swagger, and locked his eyes on Heather the moment he entered. Joanna had to admit he looked good tonight. With a button down shirt rolled to the elbows and hair styled, he was exactly Heather's type. His eyes narrowed in on Heather the second he saw her, and with her mane of light brown hair and green eyes, she tossed him a saucy smile. He quickly introduced himself to the birthday girl before he proceeded to buy her drinks for the remainder of the evening.

"Shots for the birthday girl!" Brandon called out as he handed shots of Jager to the three girls and took the last for himself. Just as she downed the dark liquid, Lisa's favorite song began to play and she dragged Joanna to the dance floor.

When had Lisa had so much to drink? Joanna thought bemused as Lisa shimmied to the music like she'd never seen. Feeling as though it was infectious, Joanna soon found herself mimicking Lisa's moves, letting loose for the first time in weeks.

"Don't look now, but Sidney is totally checking you out" Lisa breathed into Joanna's ear, "and he's coming over!"

Suddenly feeling a warm hand over the exposed skin on her back, Joanna leaned her ear into Sidney's lips "Brandon got a table at the back for all of us. You want to head over?"

Words failing her, Joanna merely looked at Sidney and nodded yes. His hand had sent shockwaves down her body when he touched her, and his breath had tickled her neck leaving a trail of goose bumps despite the heat. Grabbing Lisa's hand for support, she followed Sidney to the back of the club.

…

The rest of the night passed by quickly. Everyone was comfortably sitting together, and between Lisa and her boyfriend Frank, Joanna, Heather and Brandon, Sidney, Kris, Geno and Marc, there was more than enough conversation and alcohol to keep everyone nicely buzzed. Thankfully, no one had reached the point of sloppy drunkenness, but things definitely felt relaxed and casual.

Heather and Brandon had moved from sipping on drinks at the bar and flirting shamelessly, to sitting closer than necessary with Brandon's arm slung possessively around Heather's shoulders. Joana knew where this was leading, and she expected to find out all the dirt the following morning from Heather, whether she wanted to hear it or not she thought wryly.

Quickly pressing the power button to her phone, the time 12:41am flashed back at her. "You're not looking to go home yet, are you?" asked Sidney, sliding into the empty seat beside her.

"I think I should be asking you that, Captain Crosby," she said, placing her hand on Sidney's arm flirtatiously. The alcohol in her system already loosening her inhibitions. "Don't you have to get up early and practice?"

"I don't want to leave just yet. In fact, I have a better idea," he said, his eyes lighting up. "Lets go skating _now_."

Okay, so maybe Sidney was drunker than she thought. But when he brought up the idea to the rest of the group, everyone seemed up for it. And Lisa even found a local rink that was open until 2am.

"Only in Canada would a skating rink be open into the wee hours of the morning." Kris said, throwing an arm around Joanna's shoulder as they walked down the street. "I just love being home."

Moments later the group found themselves outside of an 80's style roller skating rink. "Ice rink, Lisa!" Sidney was saying, "I meant _ice_ skating, not _roller_ skating!" He pretended like he was mad, but he kept laughing in the middle and Lisa just rolled her eyes.

"Well we're here now. C'mon guys. It'll be fun!" Lisa said, and before Joanna knew it, everyone was lacing up their skates. Somehow drunk people skating didn't seem to make for the best combination. But as she looked up, Kris and the others seemed to be gliding past her effortlessly. Being a professional athlete probably helped with balance, she thought, wishing she could say the same for herself.

"C'mon Jo," Sidney looked down at her, extending his hand, after he finished lacing up his own skates.

She stood unsteadily, gripping onto his hand. "Can I make a confession? I can't skate."

"No wonder you were putting up such a fuss about coming here." He said, shooting a smile her way. "Don't worry, I won't let you fall."

"Did you think that maybe I didn't want to come here because as your doctor, I was worried about drunk athletes hurting themselves?" she said, as she made awkward shuffled movements on the rink, all the while holding onto Sidney with an iron clad grip.

When she looked up at Sidney, he just laughed. "You know that skating comes easier to us than even walking or running, right?" He said, lifting his eyebrows at her.

She bit her lip and looked up at him "Yeah, I thought it was something like that."

"You just can't handle not being good at something." Sidney said playfully. He moved so that he was in front of her now, taking her free hand in his. He began skating backwards, holding onto both of her hands, as she tried to match his pace moving forward.

"That's easy for you to say, mister number one draft pick!" she said.

"I didn't think you followed hockey, how do you know that?" He looked down at her, not needing his vision to guide his movements whatsoever, letting his innate proprioception do the work.

Busted. "I may have googled some things." She said hesitantly, meeting his eyes and blushing. She had been too busy looking down at her feet and making sure they were moving how she wanted them to. But she had now admitted that she had internet stalked him, and despite how embarrassed she was, she was curious to see his reaction.

"And? What did you find out?" His eyes flashed, teasing her. He was enjoying this.

He knew that his career highlights and stats were available everywhere, but he also knew that when it came to girls, that wasn't the stuff they were most interested in. Usually when he met girls they wanted to play debunk the myth with him – is it true that you dated her? Do you really make that much? And so on, and so on. He'd heard it all.

"That you live up to the hype." She said simply.

Well that was a new one, he thought. "Do I now?" He said, slowing down to a stop and in turn, slowing her down too. "You've only seen me on the ice a few times."

"I know. I meant, you. As a person."

"Really? What do you mean?" he said, genuinely curious now.

She hesitated. What she had meant was that he seemed grounded and sincere. Not something she had expected from one of the league's most prominent players. He didn't flaunt his status or seem overly cocky or arrogant, rather the opposite – the boy next door in charm and attitude.

"You're a good guy. And you live up to it."

Sidney felt his cheeks redden. He'd been paid compliments before, but for the most part, they had to do with his career as an athlete. And even when that happened, he tended to say something vague and rehearsed. To be praised on his character was new, and he was flattered that someone saw something other than hockey when they looked at him.

So he said the only thing that he could come up with. The only words that truly summed up what he was thinking, "Thanks. That actually means more than you know."

…..

"So when you're doing full flexion of the hip, they should feel pain?"

Sidney could hear Jo's voice from within the visitor training room in Toronto as he rounded the corner. Knowing that he was just moments away from seeing her, brought a smile to his face. A smile that was quickly replaced with a scowl when he saw what she was doing.

She was lying on an exam table, her right leg stretched high in the air as Grant pressed her limb further into her chest. He had been on the receiving end of that maneuver before, and he didn't remember the examiner ever needing to be _that_ close. Sidney felt his face heat as he watched the pair, not even realizing that he was there. After a moment in which it didn't appear that Grant was letting go, Sidney cleared his throat.

Both Joanna and Grant looked up at him. Grant flashed a smile in his direction as he slowly eased himself off Joanna. "What can we do for you, Sidney?"

_We? When had they become a "we"_? Jo at least had the sense to look a little flustered as she got off the exam table. But as she stood up, he took in what she was wearing and his anger skyrocketed to another level. The same black tights she had donned when the two went running together was now paired with a tight black tank top. _Penguins hockey_ was scrolled across her breasts in white lettering.

Penguins hockey. This is _my_ team_. What the fuck is going on?_

"Just needed some tape, and coach said they keep the extras here." He said tersely, stalking over to the first cabinet he could see and wrenching it open.

"Let me help you." Said Grant as he began walking over to Sidney

"I'm good" Sidney said, slamming the cabinet closed and moving to the next one. His entire body coiled tight with rage. Thankfully the second cabinet he opened had what he was looking for.

Shooting an irritated look at Grant, Sidney made to leave the room.

"Good luck tonight." Grant said, with a little too much zest in his tone.

This time Sidney didn't even bother to acknowledge him before he left.

Grant looked over at Joanna thoughtfully, "Wonder what got into him?" When she didn't reply immediately, he continued on, "Guess it's true what they say about hockey players. All hot heads at the end of the day."

Joanna shrugged her shoulders. She knew exactly what had gotten into Sidney, and her cheeks burned with embarrassment.

Truth be told, she hadn't officially turned Grant down. She worked too closely with him, to have such an awkward conversation. At least that's what she had reasoned out. Maybe it wasn't the best solution. But while Sidney hadn't declared himself to her either way, she hadn't felt any pressure or motivation to have such an honest conversation with Grant. To his credit, Grant hadn't been pushy. He was still as respectful and charming as ever.

Her work life and love life were supposed to stay separate, but the two worlds were more intertwined than ever before, and she didn't like it one bit.

….

Sidney slammed a gloved hand onto the bench, as he dropped his weight onto it. The team had just lost 3-0 against the Leafs. He just hadn't been on his game tonight. Never in the right spot for passes, not making the right plays. For christ's sake, he even got into a fight tonight. Midway into the third, he had enough. Enough of things not going his way. And he had relished the opportunity to take off his gloves and take some of his frustration out. It hadn't helped with the game though. They still ended up losing.

After the game, the reporters had been in his face, asking what had happened, and where his head was at. Well, he had a good explanation for that. _Three words!_ He had wanted to shout at them all. _Grant fucking Ward. _

Of course now he had a cut above his eyebrow that would likely need stitches. He took his time stripping down to his underarmour as he walked to the training room.

Grant was waiting, needle and thread in hand. "Take a seat, Sidney. This shouldn't take too long."

Sidney rolled his eyes. He didn't even care if he was being rude. "Lets get this over with."

"Listen," Grant said as Sidney took a seat "I know you had a rough day, but if you have a problem with me, then you-"

"Then I what?" said Sidney spat out, cutting him off.

Grant looked back at him startled.

Joanna stood in the corner of the training room, quietly watching the scene unfold. She softly walked towards the pair, and wordlessly put her hand out to Grant. He hesitated only a moment before placing the suture material in her hand, and leaving the room.

"Lay down," she said to Sidney. She said it quietly, half expecting him to rebuff her too. When he followed her instructions without comment, she breathed out a sigh of relief.

She worked wordlessly for the next few minutes. The sharp tongue of the needle piercing Sidney's smooth complexion, as she threaded his skin back together. The silence was deafening, and punctuated only by a gentle "You're all done," once she was finished.

Suddenly feeling exhausted, Sidney got to his feet and muttered a quiet "Thanks" in her direction, avoiding her eyes. He was ready to leave. Get back to the hotel and forget this day.

It wasn't until he was almost at the door, when Joanna called out to him, "Sid, wait."

He turned around silently, his expression stone-faced.

Joanna felt momentarily at a loss for words. He just looked so angry. "I'm sorry for what you saw today." When he didn't say anything she continued. "But I meant what I said. There's nothing between Grant and me. Never was, never will be."

Sidney looked at her for another moment, his resolve softening when he saw how genuinely sorry she was.

He crossed over to her in a few quick strides, and pulled her into him. Her head rested against his chest and she inhaled his scent deeply – sweat mixed with the distinctive smell of him. His arms looped around her, and she snaked her own around his waist and held him close. He held her like that for a quiet moment, before leaning down and pressing a chaste kiss to her hair. To her, it was quite possibly the most endearing thing he could have done in that moment.

"I'm sorry, Jo." He whispered, his lips still gently pressed against her dark hair. "I don't know why we keep doing this to each other."

She nodded her head against his chest in acceptance of his apology, "I know." Feeling tears well up in her eyes, she quickly blinked them away, "Me too."


	7. Chapter 7

For the second time this month, Joanna was flying back to Toronto. This time, however, it was a solo trip for thanksgiving, and without the glam of the Penguins organization. As she cleared security and walked towards her gate in the Pittsburgh airport, she noticed that the airport was brimming with people. Taking her time weaving through the herds of people milling around her, she arrived at her gate and took a scan of the area looking for a free seat. She saw strollers and luggage and people everywhere, and she continued walking until she saw an open batch of seats at the furthest end of the terminal's gate. She wheeled her carry on to a stop, sitting down heavily and breathing out a sigh, while looking around her. Across the aisle, she spotted a familiar appearing stranger. With a hat slung low on his forehead, his entire face was covered. But she thought she recognized his frame, with those broad shoulders and firm thighs. Dark brown hair curling slightly behind his ears and under his baseball cap.

Risking it, she decided to quietly call out his name. "Sid?"

He lifted his head up hesitantly, a slow smile spreading across his face when he saw it was her.

"Jo." He paused taking her in, "hey."

Just the sound of her name on his lips caused a reflex smile to sprout on her face in return. "What are you doing here?"

"Connection in TO, and then to Halifax." Sidney said, nodding his head towards the gate. "You?"

"Dr Green said it was okay if I missed the game on Sunday, so I'm taking an extended vacation to Toronto and coming back on Monday."

She took a moment to consider him. Here he was sitting in the most secluded spot possible in a busy airport, doing his best to maintain anonymity. He was traveling light too, small dufflebag perched on the seat next to him. He held his passport and ticket in one hand, and nervously fidgeted with them.

"Nice, that's awesome." Sidney said, giving her a tight smile.

_What was wrong with him?_ Joanna thought to herself. He seemed so… anxious.

Sensing her confusion, Sidney looked up at her. "Being out in the public makes me this way sometimes. He paused as if searching for the right words. "It can be difficult for me. And for the people I'm with." Sidney said, looking across at her meaningfully.

Joanna exhaled slowly. _Oh_. She held his gaze for a full moment, and slowly nodded her head. _I get it_. _You're trying to let me down easy._

Another moment passed between them, as Joanna fumbled within her purse for a distraction. Her cellphone. A book. Anything. Feeling Sidney's eyes still on her, she finally glanced up at him.

His brown eyes smoldered back at her, the intensity in them taking her breath away. He was leaning forward in his seat, as if he was trying to bridge the physical gap between them. "That doesn't mean you can't be in my life."

She looked back at him for another moment, holding his gaze. The silence between them saying more than words.

"If you want to be." He added lightly, relaxing his posture and allowing himself to settle back into his seat.

Joanna's head was swimming. She thought he was breaking things off, and now here he was warning her, but still asking her for another chance.

"This is a general boarding announcement for Flight 7362 to Toronto." Said a clipped voice from the front of the gate, "We now invite customers requiring wheelchair assistance, and those seated in business class to proceed to the podium."

"That's me." Sidney stood, hoisting his bag on one shoulder, and adjusting the brim of his hat to cover his face again. "I'll be seeing you."

She turned and watched him move away. He kept his head down, and walked slowly to the front of the gate. No one approached him, and for that, she was sure he was thankful. As he handed over his passport and ticket to the airline agent, she could see her do a double take as she checked it against his profile. She hesitated for only the briefest of moments before letting him board. He made to move quickly into the depths of the airport, but just before he turned the bend, he looked back and searched for Joanna's face among the crowd of faces. As soon as he caught her eyes, he winked and continued walking.

Joanna took her time gathering up her things and boarding with the rest of the economy class. She held her breath as she passed Sidney's seat on the way to the back of the plane. He wasn't keeping an eye out for her though. Instead, he had purposefully pulled out a book and was keeping his head down reading.

Joanna settled into her window seat, as her neighbor took the aisle seat next to her, a thirty something mom with young baby in tow.

Joanna couldn't take her mind off Sidney. Knowing that he was just feet from her, but unable to reach him, made her long for him in a way that she didn't think was possible. She just wanted to spend time with him. Talk to him.

As if sensing her thoughts, she looked up and there was Sidney. He was striding down the aisle towards her. A thoughtful look on his face. He slowed his stride as he reached her aisle, and placed a hand on the seat in front as he flashed a smile down at Joanna's seatmate.

"Hi there. I have a seat in business class." He swallowed, looking to Joanna now, "She's a friend of mine, and I was hoping we could switch seats so that I could sit here instead."

The young mother looked from Joanna to Sidney uncertainly, "Are you sure?"

Sidney nodded firmly, "Absolutely."

Looking grateful for her sudden turn of good fortune. She stood, and with baby in one arm, even larger diaper bag in the other, she teetered to the front of the plane. By no means were airplane seats roomy, and in an effort to give Sidney some more room, Joana lifted up the armrest separating them. An invitation for him to sit down.

"Thanks." He said, as maneuvered his body into the tight seat, more than comfortably taking up his allotted space and even some of hers. With anyone else, Joanna would have hugged the window, effectively separating herself. But it was Sidney. _He's seen me naked!_ So she held still while she let him settle in. The length of her thigh nestled against his.

"So why did you-"

He cut her off gently with a look. From this close, she could see the soft brown hair he had let grow, curling gently at the back of his head and the traces of a five o'clock shadow over his jaw and upper lip. "Because I wanted to."

She bit back a smile. _Good answer._

…

"So I guess this is it." She said, pointing towards the sign above their heads. Straight ahead, was the exit. To the left, connecting flights.

"See you next week?" His voice was hopeful.

She slid her arms around his neck and hugged him, "I'll be at practice on Monday." The nearness of him steadied her, and after a long moment, she relaxed her hold. Sidney arms lingered on her waist, as he carefully lifted a hand and tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear. She breathed out shakily, and he smiled in response.

"I have to go or I'll miss my flight." He said, looking sincerely sorry to leave.

She nodded in response. They were finally on the same page, and now she wouldn't see him for several days. Poor timing. _Story of my life_.

"Don't look so disappointed." He said, chuckling, when he saw her expression. Reaching for her hand, he gave it a quick squeeze and began moving his thumb methodically in reassuring strokes. Up and down, along the back of her hand.

"Text me when you land." She said, as she slowly released his hand and took hold of her suitcase instead. As she spoke, a sudden rush of people turned the corner and Sidney grabbed her by the waist to avoid the onslaught, backing the two of them up into a tight corner before they parted ways.

"Of course." He said. He wanted to kiss her. Here, right now. At Pearson international airport. But he could already see a few people sneaking looks in their direction, and Sidney quickly lowered his head. He could never be a normal guy, he thought miserably to himself.

She pressed her cheek to his. "Monday." Referencing when she would see him next.

"Monday." He agreed.

…

Though it wasn't thanksgiving in Canada, she made the most of her time off and relaxed, enjoying her mother's home cooked food, and catching up with her family. She had exchanged a few texts with Sidney, but for the most part counted down the days until she would be seeing him again.

The penguins had won their home game on Sunday against the Rangers, and seeing Sidney's face fill her television screen had brought butterflies to her stomach. Her mom had suspected she was dating someone new, "you have that look," she had kept saying to her. But Joanna had refused to say anything. And to be honest, there really was nothing to tell. Only the possibility of something more.

Monday. Just the thought, made her shiver with anticipation.

After the end of the first period, they had conducted an interview with Sidney. He had taken off his helmet, and the first thing she noticed was his freshly cut hair. She had to admit that she liked him better with shorter hair, because that's how he had it when she met him in Spain. His cheeks glowed with exertion, and beads of sweat shone on his face.

Damn. He was hot.

He consumed most of her thoughts for the remainder of her time at home. And though she loved being back in Toronto, she had never been more excited to get back to Pittsburgh.

As she shuffled off the plane with the other passengers following her weekend at home, she turned her phone on and checked her messages.

"Keep an eye out for me. I came to pick you up." From Sidney. She checked the time stamp, he had sent the message a few minutes ago. Unable to keep the smile off her face, she hurried to exit the terminal. Soon she saw the usual large crowd of family and friends waiting for their loved ones, and standing off to the side of the crowd was Sidney. His usual uniform of low slung baseball hat, paired with a sign that he was holding up in one hand. "Jo" had been written in large lettering at the top. Underneath of that, he had printed, "Pick up courteously of James."

She practically ran the last few feet to him, before launching herself into his arms. "Nice sign." She said pulling away to look at him.

He laughed along with her, as he pulled her suitcase behind him and led her to the parking lot.

"So… James." She said, her eyes twinkling with laughter. "Not that I don't love seeing you. But wasn't this a little risky?" she gestured with her arms to the people around her.

"Maybe," he said shrugging his shoulders casually, "but I kept things low key while I waited for you."

"So, no taking your shirt off or trying to hand out autographed photos of yourself?" she said, keeping a straight face.

"Nah, I tried to hold back." He said, grinning at her.

The drive back was a quiet one. Neither of them feeling the need to chatter incessantly, they both knew there was more to come. At one point, Sidney had reached over for her hand. But otherwise, the two enjoyed a companionable silence on the drive back to the city.

He had never been to her apartment she realized, as she gave him directions, and watched as he navigated around the city deftly.

"We live in the same neighbourhood. You're only a few blocks away from my condo." He said in way of explanation.

He pulled into the visitor parking, and turned off the engine, before stepping outside and taking her luggage out. Without waiting for an invitation, he wheeled her suitcase up to the front door of the apartment complex and headed inside.

"Which unit is yours?"

"Two floors up." They took the stairs up to her apartment on the third floor, and she fumbled for a minute with her keys as she unlocked the door, the nerves setting in.

Once they were inside, Sidney set her suitcase down by the door, and turned to look at her expectantly. Joanna slowly removed her jacket and scarf and set them on her coatrack, inviting Sidney to do the same.

"Come inside?"

Sidney crossed into her apartment, taking everything in. It was surprisingly spacious, not what he expected from the outside. A great deal of natural light, large balcony to the left of an inviting couch, and hallway leading into her bedroom. He could see the edge of a plush bed, and felt his face heat, he was getting ahead of himself. So he turned back to the set of photos lining her walls, seeking out Joanna's face in every frame.

After a moment, she came to stand beside him, clutching a mug of hot chocolate.

"Want some?" she asked, holding out the cup.

Sidney shook his head. "I'm okay."

Joanna let him continue perusing her photos, while she worked out the words that she wanted to say… That she wanted to be with him, but wasn't sure how it would work. And that she had given his warning serious thought, and still didn't know what to do. Being in a relationship with such a public figure would be tough on her, but she had a gut feeling that he would be worth it. Did he feel the same way? So many questions and what ifs. In the end, she opted for the simple truth.

"I missed you." When he turned to look at her, she set her mug down and took a step towards him. "Not just this weekend. But since we met. I've been missing you."

That was all he needed to hear. He closed the gap between them in one quick motion, and kissed her.

His lips moved insistently against her own, soft and firm all at once. He moved his hands from her shoulders down to her waist, pulling her into him, and she breathed out a sigh. Joanna suppressed a shiver, as she pressed her length along his, feeling his taught muscles swell. They had last kissed in Spain. That time, it had been fun and flirtatious, not realizing what was in store for them down the road. Now, it was filled with passion and promise of a future.

She pulled away from him then, already feeling that her body was miles ahead of where her head was. If she left her hormones in charge, she would have pulled him into the bedroom and done Spain part deux.

Sidney, nevertheless, had a big smile tugging across his face. His eyes lit and cheeks pink. "I missed you too."

She laughed with him then, gently touching her forehead to his. Breathing deeply, inhaling him in.

"Are you sure?" he whispered it so quietly, she almost wasn't sure if she had heard him correctly.

She placed a hand lightly on his chest, and could almost feel his heart thump. She looked down, and then into his eyes, as he placed a steadying hand over top of hers. "You have me." He said. It was simple, but looking at him, she could see the hope brimming in his eyes, and knew that he spoke the truth.

She nodded up at him then. Yes, she was sure. Yes, she wanted to be with him.

And the rest, all of the questions and uncertainty, they could face tomorrow.

_Finally some development for these two, hope everyone enjoyed this chapter! _


	8. Chapter 8

He had kissed her, and now he was gone.

Joanna stared at the calendar she had pinned up on her bulletin board. Kiss, Monday. Gone, Tuesday. Return, Saturday.

She didn't know how the other wives and girlfriends did this all the time.

She had tried keeping busy. Cleaned her apartment, did the laundry, bought groceries, had drinks with coworkers. It only filled a few hours each day after work though. The rest of the time she found her thoughts drifting to him. They had spent so long skirting one another these last few months, she had become accustomed to pushing him to the back of her mind. Afraid to let him overtake her thoughts, when she was so sure nothing could come of it.

But everything was different now.

He had left for his road trip the following day, promising to be home soon. His face filled with regret, "I'm so sorry to be leaving you like this," he had whispered to her.

He had called every night, and hearing his voice had plugged the void for her. They told each other about their days, and it was starting to feel like a real relationship. But they were both too busy, and they only talked for a few minutes before having to say goodbye again.

Of course, he had played amazingly while he was away, racking up two or three points each game. Joanna naively hoped that she had something to do with his stellar performance.

She breathed out a sigh as she turned away from the calendar and to the textbook in front of her. Tonight, she was distracting herself by studying. She glanced over at the time display on her laptop, it was now officially after midnight. One more sleep and she would see him. The seconds couldn't tick by fast enough.

Shutting the lid on her computer, she decided to call it a night. She stood and stretched, her muscles stiff after hours sitting at her cramped desk. She was mid-yawn when she heard the alert of a text message come through on her phone.

"Still awake?"

It was from Sidney. Her heart performed a little summersault, just seeing his name.

"Yes! Are you back in town?"

She cradled the phone in her hands, impatiently waiting for his reply. Thankfully she didn't have to wait too long. "I'm outside."

Joanna found herself hurrying to her balcony. The cool breeze hitting her in sharp waves as she opened the sliding glass doors and stepped into the night, clad in only a tanktop and shorts. She snuck a quick peek down below, and sure enough she could see Sidney's SUV parked.

She closed the door and texted back, "Well what are you waiting for? Come up!"

A feeling of elation passed through her, as she quickly checked her reflection in the mirror mounted on her living room wall. She hadn't been waiting up for him, but she certainly didn't look like she was expecting company either. Pulling out the tie that was holding her hair up in a messy bun, she shook her hair so that it rained down in waves. That would have to be good enough for now.

Unlocking and opening her door, she could see Sidney as he rounded the corner of the stairs. His brown eyes immediately softening when he saw her. Joanna suddenly felt weak kneed.

He took the final steps two at a time, and walked purposefully towards her, not slowing his stride until their lips met softly. He cupped her face in his hand, and moved his lips gently and leisurely against her own, taking his time with her. His lips traced a path up her jaw and then to her earlobe, before whispering "hi" in her ear.

She laughed softly, taking hold of the lapels of his winter coat and pulling him into her apartment. Shrugging out of his jacket, he took off his matching toque as well and placed both neatly on the arm of her sofa. Underneath he wore a fitted dress shirt and pants that hugged his body, showing off toned arms and flat belly.

Turning back towards her, Joanna felt an overwhelming urge to be as close to him as possible. She reached up and hugged him, waiting for his hands to settle in along her waist.

"Don't leave again," she said burying her face into his chest. Half laughing, she smiled up at him, "Because I missed you way too much."

"Me too, babe." She could feel the rumble of Sidney's voice as it rattled through his body. "I couldn't wait to see you, drove here straight from the airport."

They stood in silence for a moment hugging each other. Neither feeling the need to let the other go.

After a moment, Joanna lifted her head from Sidney's chest and joined her lips to his. This time, Sidney was less gentle with her. He walked her backwards until he had her pressed against the back of her doorframe. The nearness of him, left Joanna feeling as if her body was on fire. She needed his touch. Craved it even. And every caress he offered felt like relief.

Sidney fingered the hem of her tanktop for a moment, before he lifted the clingy fabric up a few inches, and anchored his hands to her waist. The feeling of his bare hands on her skin, left Joanna wanting more. She worked on loosening his tie, and when she finally had it undone, moved her way down to the buttons lining his dress shirt. Joanna ran her hands greedily across his shoulders once they were bare, as Sidney sprinkled kisses along her neck. Losing herself in the sensation, her head knocked gently against the back of the doorframe, while she fought to suppress a moan. His hands moved to remove her top, their lips parting for only the briefest of moments as he helped divest her of her clothing. Joanna was lost in the feel of Sidney's hands running across her body, when she heard a faint ringing.

_Just ignore it_.

But when she felt Sidney's lips stop moving against her own, she pulled her mouth away from his.

"Fuck. I think that's me." Sidney said.

He began rummaging in his pant pocket, frowning when he saw the caller ID. Shooting her an apologetic look, he turned to answer it.

"Hey what's up?" Sidney said into this phone.

He paused for a moment, listening. "Nah man, I'm not home."

He turned to face her, frowning when he saw that she was fully clothed again and sitting on the sofa. Joanna took in his tussled hair, loosened belt and smiled.

"Don't worry about it." He said into the phone, and then more exasperated this time, "I'm fine. Don't worry about it."

He ended the call and pocketed the phone, before coming to stand in front of her.

"Why are you dressed?" he said looking down at her, disappointed.

Joanna suppressed a smile, but ignored the question. "What was that about?"

Sidney sighed before sitting down beside her. "That was Bortuzzo." His placed a hand on her thigh as he turned to look at her. "Said he was driving past my place and didn't see my car there, and was wondering where I was."

"Oh." Joanna said, unsure of what else to say. And then lightly adding, "That was kind of a stalker move of him."

Sidney laughed unsteadily, "Yeah."

The greater meaning of the conversation settled in heavily around them: he hadn't told Bortuzzo that he was with her.

"We should probably talk." He said.

They both paused for a moment, unsure of how to proceed.

"I haven't told anyone." Joanna offered first, "about you and me, I mean."

"Neither have I." Sidney said, breathing out heavily.

"Is that how you want it?" Joanna said, finally looking over at Sidney. She wasn't sure how to feel. Relief, anger and sadness swept through her all at once.

"I don't know. I guess I just assumed that we would tell people. But when Bortz called just now, I don't know…" he shrugged his shoulders in apology. "I just wanted to protect you."

"Protect me?" Joanna asked, her eyes widening in surprise. "From what?"

"You know." He paused, the moment stretching between them. "From me."

"Sid." She said, her eyes closing in defeat. She shook her head slowly, before opening her eyes again. She scooted closer to him on the couch, and climbed into his lap.

"I'd be lying if I said that you don't intimidate me. Your name, and debt to this city. But when you asked me if I was sure, I didn't hesitate. Because I want to be with you." She laced her fingers through his and squeezed his hand. "But it's not just about who you are. My job is on the line too. Dr Green and Grant can't know that we're together. If they did, my career would be over like this," she said snapping her fingers for effect.

Sidney linked his hands together, drawing Joanna to his chest, thinking all the while. She was one of the best things in his life right now, and he wanted everyone to know that. But that in itself was the problem, he was quickly realizing. Everyone knowing just wasn't going to work for them.

"Maybe we should keep things quiet for now." He finally said. It seemed to be the only solution. But then why did he feel so uneasy?

Joanna rested her head on his shoulder, mulling his words over. "I guess that would be best."

"Only temporary though, right?" Sidney asked

"Only temporary." She confirmed.

"What about our friends? Marc, Kris, Heather?"

"I guess we can tell them." She looped an arm around his abdomen, snuggling into his side. "And Brandon, Vero, Catherine, Lisa." She added. "I trust them. But I think we should keep it just to that little group. Is that okay with you?"

"Sure." He said easily.

They sat in comfortable silence for a moment. Sidney absent mindedly curled Joanna's hair through his fingers. And Joanna closed her eyed contentedly, thoroughly appreciating that Sidney had forgotten to put his shirt back on.

"Jo," Sidney's voice cut through the silence, "Can I take you out? On a real date?"

She looked up at him startled, "But I thought we just agreed on no public stuff?"

"I know, but that doesn't mean we have to be hermits either." He said, smiling down at her. "Although I wouldn't mind being trapped indoors with you. I think we could come up with a way to pass the time." He said, as he slowly moved his hand down the length of her arm and to the bare skin of her thigh.

Joanna chuckled. "What did you have in mind?"

"On ways to pass the time? Well we could start by-"

"Sid!" Joanna laughed, interrupting him.

He laughed with her, sobering a moment later. "How about we just do something fun?"

She nodded up at him and smiled, "That sounds perfect."

…

Joanna took her time getting ready. Sidney had texted her earlier in the day, to say she should dress warmly and comfortably. Cryptic. And not the usual instructions you give for a date. She opted for boots, jeans and an oversized sweater. She packed a pair of mittens into her bag as she took the stairs down her apartment and waited for Sidney.

His car pulled up a moment later, and he quickly jumped out and opened the passenger door for her.

"So where are we going?" she asked curiously as she slipped into the heated interior.

"You'll find out soon." He said, reaching over for her hand as he continued driving.

Soon they were pulling up outside of an elementary school, and Joanna followed Sidney outside of the car with a quizzical expression.

Sidney laughed when he saw her face, "Just trust me."

He moved to the trunk of his car and extracted a large toboggan.

"Ooh!" Joanna actually jumped once or twice, before clapping her hands together in excitement . "Tobogganing!" She leaned up to kiss him. "What a great idea."

Sidney smiled when she saw how excited she was, and took her hand in his as he led her around the back of the school. As the school building faded away, a large snow covered hill loomed in front, perfect for sledding.

"How did you find out about this place?" she said in wonderment.

"Chris brings his kids here," said Sidney "and he said weekends and evenings are the best time to come because the school isn't running."

As Sidney maneuvered the toboggan into place, Joanna eagerly sat down in front. "You sure you want to drive for the first run?" Sidney said skeptically.

"I'm Canadian!" she laughed at him, "this stuff is supposed to run in my blood."

Sidney climbed into position behind her, his legs coming around to settle in on either side of her. He wrapped his hands around her waist for support, and rested his head next to hers bringing their cheeks together.

_I could get used to this!_ She thought, as she grabbed the reigns of the sled. "Ready?" Sidney said into her ear. She nodded back, as he used his hands to propel them forward. Sidney tightened his hold on her, as they careened down the hill.

Joanna hadn't done this in years. The wind they were generating whipped around them, and the speed of their descent down the hill and nearness of Sidney was sending her heart into a frenzy.

As the toboggan slid to a bumpy stop, she angled her head to look at Sidney. "That was amazing! Lets go again." She stood up enthusiastically, ready for the next run.

They must have walked up that hill at least a dozen times. Halfway through, Sidney had switched spots with Joanna at the front of the sled. As they reached the bottom of the hill, Sidney attempted to neatly slow down the descent, by sliding his body weight to the left when he felt the toboggan shifting. But it was too much force, and they both tumbled out of the sled landing in an untidy heap.

"Ow." Joanna said, rubbing the elbow that had taken most of the impact. Sidney lay next to her and began laughing. A real laugh, the belly-aching kind. Joanna looked down at him, his hat had been tossed off his head in their sloppy landing and his cheeks were glowing. She began laughing too, and he rolled over to her a moment later.

"Guess I'm no good at steering." He said, as he hovered over her, his weight propped up on his elbows.

"Uh uh" she said, shaking her head, while grabbing his face in her mitten-covered hands.

He stilled over her, and brought his hand to her face, running his ungloved thumb along her lower lip.

Joanna felt a tugging in her heart when she looked up at him. It was starting to feel familiar. She loved spending time with him, almost as much as she hated when he left for a road trip. _I guess this is how life with him is going to be_, she thought to herself.

He leaned down to press a kiss to her lips. His cool lips sending a spark down her body despite the chilly temperature outside.

Life with him would be tough. Of that, she had no doubt. But she had a gut feeling that he was going to make it worth her while, every step of the way.

…

Dinner at Sidney's apartment afterwards was delicious. But it was really his company that was the highlight. For the first time, Sidney and Joanna spent time learning about each other. He told her about coming to Pittsburgh for the first time, being thought of as a young prodigy, and how Mario had taken him under his wing. She told him about Andrew, her first real love. And he, in turn, told her about the girlfriend that he had on and off for a few years when he first came to the city.

"So no one after that?" she asked coyly.

His faced reddened. "I know what people think about me." He said, eyeing her over the rim of his wine glass.

"And what's that?"

He sighed. "That I'm either completely celibate or that I'm hooking up with a girl in a different city every other night."

Joanna set her own wine glass down, and met his eyes across the table. _Well, which one is it?_

"I'm neither." He said in response to her unvoiced question. "And sure there have been a few girls here and there, but never anything serious."

"And this?" Joanna was almost afraid to ask. She had assumed they were exclusive, and hadn't given it a second thought. She suddenly felt caught off guard. _Is this why he had agreed to keep things a secret? So that he could date other people?_

He saw a series of thoughts and emotions cross her face, before she settled on uncertainty. He reached over for her hand and gently pulled her to him. "This is something more." She stood quietly, as he held both of her hands in his. "Lets just explore this."

She nodded, sitting down in his lap. He always simple and to the point, it was one of the things she was starting to like best about him. Joanna fingered the collar of his pullover absent-mindedly. "Heather is coming to visit me next weekend."

Sidney raised an eyebrow at her, knowing there was more that she wasn't saying. "Well to visit me _and _Brandon," she elaborated.

"Nice, that's awesome. Is she coming to our home game against the Predators?"

"Probably."

Sidney suddenly began laughing. "What's up?" Joanna said, probing him.

"Well it'll be an interesting weekend, because you'll get to finally meet James."

"What?" _I thought you were James? _

Sidney sobered when he saw her confusion. "He's an old teammate of mine that plays in Nashville now. And he was… who I kind of pretended to be when I first met you."

Between Heather and Brandon and this new James, suddenly next weekend was looking like it was going to be anything but ordinary.


End file.
